That’s the thing with romantic relationships, they all seem so dreamy that we fail to see the venomous truth behind that fairy tale-like packaging. And our failure to do so, gradually works us into the kind of frustration that eventually leads to an ugly breakup.
My point is, why go till the end in hopes of restoring the magical feeling you felt on your first few dates, especially, when in reality, the relationship is toxic to the core. All relationships have issues, and working them out draws us closer in love. But certain ones, are just not meant to be. They come with an expiration date, and the sooner you realize that, the better.
So here goes, certain signs that will help you identify if the bond that you are in, is worth keeping.
1. The constant inability to establish a smooth communication
It is normal to feel a little hesitated during the initial dates, but if that’s how you feel every single time, then perhaps you don’t even want to be in that relationship. If the words don’t come out fluently and with conviction, it is a sign that your heart is not in sync with what you are doing.
2. You can feel yourself changing, and not for good
A little bit of compromising is good and sometimes important. But giving up your true self, your true identity, which once used to keep you connected to yourself, for someone else is never a healthy compromise. And any relationship that does not make you grow as a ‘person’ but stagnates it, or even worse, pushes you down, is not worth holding onto.
3. It is all about comfort, and not so much about real love
More often than not, we get into relationships simply because we are too petrified of being single, and relationship, on the other hand, provides us with the much-needed attention and comfort. But, how can a relationship last if we are not totally comfortable in our own skin? How does it make any sense to be a part of something simply because it comforts us? It is not possible for them to keep you comforted all the time, and therefore, once the daily rides stop for whatever reasons, the bond ends.
And that’s why for whatsoever reasons if those in a real relationship are not able to help each other at certain important times, it is love that keeps the boat afloat.
4. As cliché as it may sound, real love, at all times, is truly selfless
Real love does not require benefits. It only requires that strong feeling of being together with each other, irrespective of whether you stay continents apart or at the next door. The pure feeling matters.
And whatever it is that you do for each other, until and unless, it is not out of pure love, it is not real.
5. A forced relationship
If you step into the world of romance simply because the happy faces of your friends who are in relationships made you pity yourself, then you are neither being fair to yourself nor to your partner. It is a fake relationship because right from the day one you know your heart is not into it, but since you have things to prove and happy faces to imitate, you get into it anyway and suffer.
6. Too much of public display of affection
Not caring about the floating eyes because you are head over heels in love with your partner is one thing. Doing it simply for the sake of experience and to prove it to yourself or to the world around you that you are in a fulfilling relationship, is totally another thing and not at all a good sign.
7. Have no memorable moments at all
True love does not have to make rooftop announcements about how well it is doing, but, to partners, it always gives certain memories to look back at and smile. If there is nothing at all in your relationship that makes for a pleasant memory, then maybe it is time to move out of something that is not turning out to be meaningful and special.
Real love is always, always, special.
8. Don’t really know your partner
It has been quite some time for you since the cupid first blessed you, but now that you think of it, you don’t really know them well enough. Not just that, most times you don’t really know how to feel or if the way you are feeling is appropriate or not. True love is not supposed to keep you shrouded in such meaningless confusions.
9. Little to no tolerance of each other’s professional standing
It is not unusual for self-complex to bite us every now and then, humans have issues. However, love in its real terms does not care about the professional status. It just wants what the heart wants, and the heart in true love only desires the heart that it beats for.
10. When it is only sexual- The undeniable sign of a fake relationship
It makes you feel like you are on cloud nine each and every time. Sure, sex is supposed to make you feel like that. But that racy feeling ends, and there you are the next morning, lying in the same bed with the same person you had all the fun with, yet feeling a void inside and having no words to say.
Real love is not always conceived at the first sight itself, it does not have to be a proper date in the fanciest of restaurants, it also does not have to be that special finger brush that shoots up your adrenaline. In fact, sometimes it hits off in most disastrous of ways. But once you are in it, you know it.
Now that I think of it, I wonder what has taken us to prefix ‘true’ to ‘love’ in order to give out its pure essence (I guess fake relationships are the culprit). I always thought that the word ‘love’ itself gives out the essence of all things pure and selfless and true.